Just over three years ago, this random guy found himself alone in his apartment amidst COVID isolation watching Hanasaki Miyabi and Kageyama Shien streams. That same guy said, “Hey, I feel incredibly comforted watching this. I wonder if I could bring some of the same comfort to other people?” And so the incredibly spontaneous decision to become a vtuber and create our Cozy Cabin came to be.

Having never commissioned any art and only used Twitch for streaming live events or sharing gameplay with friends stuck working night shifts, it was a daunting endeavor. Yet, somehow, Yuki was born. But, just like in real life, vtubers graduate, retire, move on, or whatever you might want to call it. And as bittersweet as it may be, it seems it’s Yuki’s time to do just that (and at this age, we might as well settle on calling it a retirement).

Everyone’s time is valuable, so we’ll put the important information up top. Our last stream will be held on Sunday, September 8th at 2 PM US Eastern. We’ll play some 100% Orange Juice and Mario Kart together and end with some final positive memories. I hope you’ll join us!

With that out of the way, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on these three years and think about what the future has in store for all of us.

Who Was Yuki?

Yuki was created to represent both the parts of me that I liked and those I wish I had. He should be friendly, mature, and someone you would feel incredibly comfortable around because that’s what I wanted for myself.

His original design was intended to capture the spirit of a cool teacher: someone fashionable, a role model, yet familiar. As someone who studied to be an elementary school teacher, obtained a TESOL certificate, and then ended up in a totally different job, this was important to me during the concept phase. Toss in the bobcat elements to represent a local animal, and we had something! We also borrowed from comfort characters like Natsume Takashi, intelligent yet sarcastic characters like Azusagawa Sakuta, and sharp ones like Katou Haru.

Yuki was openly gay from the start; a huge step for helping me understand my sexuality. At a time when I only saw clippers shipping Holostars talents, yet never saw talents able to talk about sexuality openly, I worried that gay vtubers might not have a place to be themselves in the big leagues. I admit now to not knowing how large the queer vtuber space already was then. But, I also never had a space to talk about gay stuff in real life, so curating an online space where that could happen was very important to me nonetheless.

Fast forward a few years, and Yuki 2.0 was born. The redesign tried to capture both how I’d aged and matured as a person and how I’d grown to love fantasy Webtoons. We can have both, right? I still like to think so.

Accepting that teaching was never going to happen, his casual look became more relaxed while his formal, Duke of the North design captured a sense of mature elegance and ice, but not an icy demeanor. He would still be the same, approachable person from before… just with a fancy title added on. I loved him a lot, and I hope you did too.

Meeting Our Goals

Back in that debut stream in 2021, I outlined a few loose goals. How’d we do with them?

Form a community

I’d say we did very well with this one! I’ve met so many people, and every single one has contributed something to our Cozy Cabin space. You all made this entire journey possible, and I cannot thank you enough. Getting to know each and every one of you was an absolute joy.

Have fun and relieve stress

I’d say we managed this, though I must admit that it’s become harder as life has just become busier and harder to keep up with. Perhaps I should say that this goal should have been both for myself and you. Did you have fun? Did I help you relieve stress? If so, I’d say we met this for sure.

Host entertaining and instructional cooking streams

We basically met this in the first week! I was really excited by the idea of doing a cooking stream since I loved cooking and baking! Shortly after starting this journey, I would end up changing roommates, which made this hard to maintain. But, the few streams we managed to do were a blast. I’m so glad we could share that time together.

Gain more experience with streaming technology

As mentioned before, most of my stream experience was broadcasting live events. I also had background with sound engineering for musicals, so I was excited to combine what I’d learned with both into something new. In that way, I say we met this goal (and we even shared some knowledge around translated subtitles along the way). Perhaps I should have considered a goal about experience with streaming community promotion and growth, however, if we wanted to truly strive for something more.

Something Unexpected

Having planned goals is great, but there are some things we find or do that are unexpected. For me, that was being able to embed myself in a queer community early on in this journey.

Even today, I still don’t have many in-person gay friends or family to confide in. As supportive as my friends and family are, finding a community where I could express myself and learn was more helpful than I ever imagined. I’ve developed a better understanding of myself, my needs, and my limits while building social confidence I never had at any point in my life. I appreciate everyone who I got to know through this; you all made more of a difference than you likely realize.

What’s Next?

Our nights might feel a bit emptier, but I hope this will be a chance for me and you to do things for ourselves. I’m in need of time to do some things that are truly important for me like resuming my Japanese studies more seriously, dating, increasing physical activity, and learning to drive. I suppose most of those are important at this age…

For you, I hope you can take and carry forward any bit of kindness, comfort, or courage you got from being in our humble Cozy Cabin. Maybe make a recipe we cooked, share a game with a friend, or take some time to chat with someone new. We can all create our own little Cozy Cabins somewhere, can’t we? I can’t wait to see how much you all continue to grow.

Writing this paragraph, I feel a few tears, so perhaps we wrap this up (and save the rest of the crying for the final stream). I must admit to how bittersweet this feels. Vtubing became a core part of my life for three whole years! Through all the ups and downs, I don’t regret a single second of it. Before we enjoy our Cozy Retirement, I hope you’ll join me in our last few weeks together. Let’s make the most of it!

~ Yuki

(Header artwork by lugia_draw)